It's true. So much of my life was spent in a difficult search for clothing that fit. Not to mention finding anything over size 14 that didn't make me look like an old school Italian widow was impossible. I was resorting to wearing men's XXXL t-shirts and pants for much of my clothing. By the mid nineties, it was getting easier, as someone finally seemed to be listening, maybe because there were more and more heavy people screaming for clothes. But it was still so limited, especially here in Canada.
Excuse me for a flash of anger: I remember shopping with a friend and being utterly bored out of my tree. She didn't seem to understand why. Why????? Imagine being in a clothing store and not one single item in that store would fit me. Scarves don't count, and I was never very good at them, despite the fact that many heavy women use them as creative camouflage. They became devious snakes when I put them on, always twisting themselves into unflattering nooses or slithering away on me.
So when I moved to NYC in 1999 and found Lane Bryant, I don't think it's an exaggeration to say I was ecstatic. It was cheap, befitting the budget of an art student, came in colors and cool patterns and they had jeans that could fit and say, yeah, I'm big, and I'm gonna flaunt those curves, baby! They even had lingerie in hot colors! Race seemed to enter into this equation: I noticed that a large portion of the clientele were black. I also realized that men who were giving me "hi there" looks or little flirty comments on the street were black. In the interest of being clear, I should note that I was down from my top weight while I was living in New York, and ranged between a size 18 and 22, and felt less self conscious about being out in public.
Once I went below size 14 I couldn't shop at LB any more. I felt a bit rootless, as if I had lost a dependable friend. Of course, now I can, as Frances Kuffel says, "pass for thin" and go into most any clothing store and find something that fits. Yeesh, I can even buy clothes at Costco, one of the most unyielding, unforgiving, one-size-sort-of-fits-only-the-average-but-its-cheap-so-shut-up retailers in existence.
Oh mercy!! It just struck me: Costco is my Lane Bryant now. My brain hurts.
2 comments:
I know what you mean. I like Lane Bryant...because I can find stuff that fits. I know what you mean, too, about minority guys liking girls that can 'pass for thin'. When I was a size 16-18, I had non-white guys asking me out left and right. White guys couldn't be bothered; I was too fat for them. It supports the unspoken consensus, that sort-of-feeling, that minorities seem to have a more healthy idea of what's beautiful.
It must feel really strange to now be able to go into any store and find clothes that fit.
I have this problem where hardly any pants/skirt fits me because my hips have gotten so wide, my thighs so thick, and yet my waist still is relatively little. That's why on a day-to-day basis, I end up wearing baggy clothes I find at thrift stores or off-price stores. I'd need to get my clothes custom-made to get something that really fits!
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