Suburban Spread

Here is my desk these days. As you can see, my capable assistant, Miss Boo, is vigilant about keeping my spot warm while I freshen up - note extra large coffee cup in the now empty cereal bowl. Apparently my appetite is back! When I settle back in, her job seems to be competing with the other laptop for space. For shame! We must get a king size bed so she's not so cramped! I used to have a labrador retriever, and I swear she took up less room than this 8 pound cat...

Recovery from the surgery continues slowly. Of course, I'm impatient. I'm bored and housebound, forbidden from doing any housework that requires lifting or sweeping. That about leaves folding laundry but not lifting the basket, dusting and who wants to dust in a half renovated house. I can't even start a fire in the woodstove. Logs are too heavy for another week or so. I have the concentration skills of a gnat. Crossword puzzles and solitaire just seem too hard. I've started this post 4 times only to go so far off topic I have to start over. I walked for 10 minutes and now I'm light headed. I feel like howling in frustration!

Rats. Scared the cat away. At least I can now unfold my legs. Of course, I'm hungry, but have resisted the siren call of the muffins.

Ever heard of HALT? OA acronym for
Hungry
Angry
Lonely
Tired

and I'm learning that when one or more of those are present, I'm in danger of eating something, or a quantity of food that won't be healthy for me. The harder thing is having the self awareness to "halt" and recognize that's what driving my hand to the fridge, or the steering wheel to McGreasy's. Of course we all want to eat when we are hungry. To me, the Hungry here is when I'm over-hungry, when I've put off a meal or a healthy snack for too long. I'm a diabetic in remission, and when I get too hungry, well... let's just say Fuzz keeps count of all his fingers to make sure I haven't gnawed one off.

The others are more subtle and require developing some habits to recognize. Writing helps. As I look back at my day I'm thinking, of course I'm lonely. Fuzz is at work. I've been talking to people on the phone, but I'm not allowed to drive for another 2 weeks, the gym and my running group are forbidden for another 5 weeks, and I have no friends within walking distance. I can't get to an OA meeting or even Starbucks, because it's all in another town. That's it, I've got to get out this weekend, if it kills me... or Fuzz, because like it or not, he's driving me.

There was another obesity study that came out this week from the Canadian Institute for Health Information, most of which could be filed in the "You Get Paid to Tell Us This?!?" file, but one bit was particularly relevant to me, the part which suggested that where you live can influence your physical activity levels. Basically, it suggested that people in urban centers got more exercise than rural and suburban dwellers.

My 10 minute walk today was done on my treadmill. It was primarily was because the weather was bad, but I have walked a lot around my small town, and while my small town is picturesque, there is very little here of interest for me to walk for. At least I live in a town that isn't a maze of suburbia and has sidewalks except, interestingly, the commercial corridor where all the grocery stores are located is a pedestrian wasteland. Apparently nobody is expected to stroll there for a head of broccoli, but the mega bag of doritos is much more accessible! Ever notice that suburban convenience stores, as opposed to urban delis or markets, have few vegetables? We're soon moving to a larger city where there will be places that I can walk or ride my bike to, or a city center where I can park and then walk around. I seem to have developed a dislike for malls, but I'm still a sucker for Costco.

Walking was one of the ways I started improving my health when I was twice this size. At the time it was the only exercise that didn't give me the creeps. When you're heavy, you have enough trouble keeping your head up in public, because people seem to go out of their way to mock you. Going to the gym was scary (gym class torture flashbacks) but walking I could do, particularly if it had a destination.

I lived in Brooklyn for a time and could walk most days over the Brooklyn Bridge to my grad school in Manhattan, which was wonderful. Unfortunately, Manhattan also has an average of a 24 hour deli and 2 restaurants per block, it seemed. My eating then was often healthy, but also often degenerated into large quantities of my favorite binge foods. On the third hand, Manhattan has the largest concentration of OA meetings I've ever seen. I guess no matter where you live, the devil can get you if you're a sufferer.